Kanyadaan - its significance

Of late many people especially the celebrities have raised their voice strongly against the age-old tradition of Kanyadaan ritual which is performed during a Hindu marriage ceremony. Even they have decided not to include it as a part of their marriage ceremonial procedures. The reason behind this is - Daan means gift or giving away; so when Kanyadaan ritual is performed, it literally means gifting or giving away a daughter which is objectionable as a daughter or a woman is not a commodity to be gifted or given away.

Now let us analyse this issue from different angles. There are three main points to be discussed in this issue -

1) How marriage is viewed in Hinduism, what are the different forms of marriages under it and what is the role of Kanyadaan in them

2) Whether a daughter or a woman is treated like a commodity during the Kanyadaan ritual?

3) Whether to include or not, the Kanyadaan ritual as a part of a Hindu marriage ceremony?

First let us discuss on the importance of marriage, different forms of marriages in Hinduism and the role of Kanyadaan in them. 

In Hinduism, Vivah or marriage is considered very auspicious and is one of the sixteen Samskaras a person is supposed to undergo during the lifetime. Through Vivah, a person lawfully indulges in sensual pleasures which fulfills Kama, one of the four Purusharthas/ultimate goals in human life (Dharma, Artha, Kama and Moksha).

Again, a person has to clear three types of debts in his lifetime. i.e. debts to the Rishis (Rishi Runa/Rina), debts to the Devas or Gods (Deva Runa/Rina) and debts to the Pitrus (Pitru Runa/Rina). By practicing Brahmacharya or celibacy one clears the debts to the Rishis, by performing Yajna Karma Anusthana one clears the debts to the Devas or Gods and by acquiring offspring one clears the debts to the Pitrus. Hence it is essential to get married in order to acquire offspring so that one gets cleared of debts to the Pitrus.

Marriages in Hinduism are of eight types. They are -

1. Brahma - doing Kanyadaan of a bride adorned with jewellery/ornaments and garments to a groom who is well educated and well behaved 

2. Daiva - doing Kanyadaan of a bride to a Purohit as Dakshina after the completion of a Yajna

3. Aarsha - doing Kanya-Pradaan of a bride to a groom in exchange of a cow and a bull (or twice in number) to a groom following usual rites

4. Praajaapatya - doing Kanya-Pradaan of a bride to a groom after a worship and telling them both to practice Dharma

5. Aasura - doing Kanya-Pradaan of a bride to a groom in exchange of wealth for the bride and the bride's family

6. Gaandharva - both bride and groom accepting each other as husband and wife out of a desire to have sensual pleasure

7. Raakshasa - forcefully marrying a crying bride after causing murder, bodily harm to her relatives and damaging her home

8. Paisaacha - marrying in secret a sleeping or intoxicated or an insane bride with a desire to have sensual pleasure

So it is learned, out of the above eight types of marriages, the first five involves the ritual of Kanyadaan or Kanya-Pradaan. Also, out of the above, the first four are considered superior or praiseworthy and the last four inferior. The eighth one especially is considered the lowest amongst all as per the scriptures.

Again, it is observed that in the last three types of marriages (Gaandharva, Raakshasa and Paisaacha) the consent of the parents/guardians are not necessary. Hence it can be safely assumed that in the first five types of marriages where Kanyadaan or Kanya-Pradaan is involved, the ritual is more like a consent of the parents/guardians for the marriage rather than the giving or gifting away of the bride.

What the Law says - 

As per the Hindu Marriage Act (1955), Hindu marriage can be validated, if the former is performed by Shastric ceremonies or Customary ceremonies of either party. Kind of marriage is not identified under this act. However, the Raakshasa and Paisaacha form of marriages are punishable offences under Indian Law.

So Kanyadaan ritual can be followed, if it is a part of the Shastric ceremonies or Customary ceremonies of either party.

Coming back to the second point (Whether a daughter or a woman is treated like a commodity during the Kanyadaan ritual), Daan or gift according to the scriptures is of various types. In this process two parties are involved. One, who gives (giver/donor) and the other who receives (recipient). In most of the Daans, a commodity is given away like money (Artha Daan), land (Bhu Daan), food (Anna Daan), clothes (Vastra Daan) etc. to a person who is worthy/in need of it as well as to gain merits. So the person who receives the Daan gets enriched/satisfied by it and the person who gives/donates earns merits provided he or she gives/donates spontaneously to a worthy person without expecting anything in return. 

There are various Daans in which things other than commodities are also given like Vidya Daan (giving away free teaching lessons), Abhaya Daan (giving of protection with assurance of self secureness or fearlessness), Jeeva Daan (gift of life as given by the Physicians) and Kanyadaan (giving the hands of a daughter in marriage).

So we understand that Daan doesn't always involve or necessarily mean giving away of commodities; it can be something spiritual in nature, something more unique, more uplifting.

Amongst all the Daans, Kanyadaan is unique as in this process both the giver and the recipient along with the members of their clan earn special merits. In the Kanyadaan ritual, the person doing Kanyadaan considers the groom as Lord Vishnu and gives away the hands of his/her daughter in form of Goddess Lakshmi for the upliftment of generations of Pitrus/future generations of both the bride and groom's family.

In the 50th Chapter of the Reva Khanda of the Avantya Khanda of the Skanda Purana it is said -

"Of all Daans, Kanyadaan is the best. A parent should give his daughter after approaching a boy of noble birth, handsome features, learning and discretion.... If the daughter dearer than one's own life is given away, it is as though all the three worlds have been given away along with the mobile and immobile things..... One should celebrate the marriage of a daughter, even if one has no wealth, merely by repeating the name of the daughter. It doesn't bring about any defect."

So the above descriptions can well be summed up as follows -

"For a father, a daughter is never a commodity; rather it is a privilege for him to perform the Kanyadaan ritual in his daughter's marriage."

Let us now come to the third and the last point - Whether to include or not, the Kanyadaan ritual as a part of a Hindu marriage ceremony?  

Before including the Kanyadaan ritual as a part of a Hindu marriage ceremony, let us discuss the legal aspects. As per a judgment given by the Honourable Additional Judge, City Civil Court, Hyderabad - 'Kanyadana' is an important part of rites of Hindu Marriage in 'Brahma form' in which the ceremony of 'Kanyadan' is an important rite and every father considers it a privilege to perform 'Kanyadan' of his daughter in her marriage. It is a different matter that omission to perform 'Kanyadana' will not result in invalidity of the marriage. In fact, this has been incorporated in Section 7(2) of Hindu Marriage Act, 1955.

So, we are not bound to follow the Kanyadaan ritual in a marriage ceremony. It solely depends upon the parties involved in the marriage ceremony whether to include the Kanyadaan ritual in it or not. But to demean its importance just because you ignorantly think it to be degradable for women is not acceptable in any sense. May the better sense prevail.

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References :

1. Manu Samhita

2. Hindu Samskruti Ank (Gita Press, Gorakhpur)

3. https://www.hindujagruti.org/hinduism/knowledge/article/why-is-kanyadan-performed-after-garlanding-of-bride-and-groom.html

4. https://www.wisdomlib.org/hinduism/book/the-skanda-purana/d/doc425779.html

5. https://indiankanoon.org/docfragment/1489083/?formInput=kanyadan

6. https://www.theblawgger.com/post/forms-of-marriage-under-hindu-law